Archive for April, 2005

Saturday — 20 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 10 Vaisakh 19…

Saturday — 20 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 10 Vaisakh 1927 — 30 April 2005

Ok. As you might have noticed. Now that I spend about twelve hours a day away from home working, I might not be able to blog very regularly.

Big deal. You are all already quite my bitches. So you all keep reading this or I am going to call you and then get one of my severe multi personality disorder breakdowns and give you the head ache of the century.

So basically, I am going to blog less now. But I still love you.

My God. How much testosterone do I have in my body?

Sunday — 14 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 04 Vaisakh 1927…

Sunday — 14 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 04 Vaisakh 1927 — 24 April 2005

Ahhhhhh, the darling buds of April. Rather the memories of the darling buds of March. Karachi weathers early. You have spring in mid March and summer in April. And then for the last two weeks you have horridly hot days. And to top all this off the humidity makes it very very sweaty.

I, of course do not complain. Except for the fact that when I give my dripping wet shirt to the drycleaner and tell him that it is 100% cotton and he is not, I repeat not, I repeat not in the name of his lord, I repeat not in the name of all that is holy and pure, I repeat not in the name of all that is beautiful and lovely from the smile on a babys cheek to the bottom of a newly cleaned baby to starch the shirt. He does it all the same and when I tell him I told him not to do this, he merely smiles at me and moves on.

What am I to do dear lord. What am I to do when my white cotton shirt has been starched so much that when I walk into my office in the morning I can hear it rustling away in such loud a manner that I can hear the sound echo off the walls of the building opposite to ours at a distance of about fifty meters.

What am I to do!

I will leave you now and drink some more Pakola! Take care of yourselved gentlemen and beautiful dames!

Thursday — 11 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 01 Vaisakh 19…

Thursday — 11 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 01 Vaisakh 1927 — 21 April 2005

I have realized today that I am a deprived soul. I have missed some of the most beautiful things in life. There were things that I used to think nothing of. Today, I got the chance to experience one of those. And I realize that I have wasted a lot of my life by not have that experience before.

I am not talking about the movie “The Others”. I am not talking about the musical piece “Ode to Joy”. I am not talking about multiple synchronous orgasms.

I am talking about eating a sandwitch at subway. I had never had one simply because they seemed like “just” sandwitches.

But, today, I stand corrected. Subway is not only a sandwitch. When you go to the counter and tell them to give you assorted meats and condiments and no vegetables whatsoever. It becomes a man’s food. Yes, subway. A man’s food at its best.

Wednesday — 10 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 30 Caitra 19…

Wednesday — 10 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 30 Caitra 1927 — 20 April 2005

I went to get a complete physical check up today. It was the strangest experience. I mean, for all practical reasons I think that the doctor should have married me after we were done. Although she was a woman, but the things that she did to me, in my opinion should only be done by women to men whome they are married to.

Ohk, even if she did not marry me, she should have bought me breakfast.

Sunday — 07 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 27 Caitra 1927 …

Sunday — 07 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 27 Caitra 1927 — 17 April 2005

Well, it is always a wonder to be present on a Sunday. Suddenly you are jarred into real life. While trying to forget the work week. While trying to forget the abnormal level of lunatic partying on Saturday night you are suddenly aware that there is such a commodity as time.

As is the case with every Sunday, my evil mother wakes me up at one and tells me that if I dont get up she will give my breakfast to the cat. The cat, by the way, is extremely pregnant. So much so that everyone at home realizes it and does not talk about it. Uncomfortable topics being left alone as a rule in this house.

Later on in the evening relatives drop by and we decide to gulp down gallons of tea while playing cards and talking against all those relatives who had not dropped by this week. The best thing about this situation is that since my mother has not allowed me to miss any Sunday, they never get to talk against me.

Ahhhhhh, Sundays are such fun days!

p.s – Excuse the last line. It was written in a rather peculiar state of mind.

Friday — 05 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 25 Caitra 1927 …

Friday — 05 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 25 Caitra 1927 — 15 April 2005

Well. I was told today that I would be much much much more acceptable as a person if I just did not open my mouth and did not move my hands while talking.

One does not really know what to do when something like that is told to one.

I tackled it by realizing that the guy is actually right. But then again I am going through a severe testosterone rush and my brain might not be working properly.

I will tell you about the actual result in a week or so.

Wednesday — 03 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 23 Caitra 19…

Wednesday — 03 Rabi ul Awwal 1426 — 23 Caitra 1927 — 13 April 2005


I did not get the damned weekend off. On top of that, I havent been out of work before 8 any day of this week.

Despite the lack of sex. I feel like an unvirgin already.