Archive for May, 2007


Wednesday – 28 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 26 Vaisakh 1929 – 16 May 2007

After working for two and a half years, travelling across Pakistan on business and personal trips, reading newspapers and cheap tabloids such as The News and Roznama Sahafat, listening to news on television, sharing thoughts and ideas with Pakistanis from all walks of life I have come to two basic conclusions about Pakistan and Pakistanis.

Firstly, we are absolutely, completely and unequivocally Insane. The level of insanity can only be likened to a Cow that is quite high on LCD trying to crack a joke with a flying frog who is having severe Post Menstrual Syndrome and can only bark back at the cow. In case the previous sentence did not make sense, the frog exists only in the cows imagination. And the cow actually knows this, but still thinks that the frog exists and at the same time needs to believe that it doesnt. In case I have not been clear. Very very very insane indeed.

Secondly we are unbelievably impatient and believe in the shortest possible fix. This leads to massive ad hocism in our society. We take bribes to get rich quickly. We make absolutely moronic political decisions that can be seriously criticized by the stupider class of hyenas in a hyena lunatic asylum. Also, if I need say, this is also the way our businesses work, adhocism, short sightedness and absolute moronicity. If that is not a word, I just made it up. So shut up. Sit down. Take deep breaths and go grow or weed something to calm yourself down

I absolutely love this country.


Tuesday – 27 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 25 Vaisakh 1929 – 15 May 2007

Finally went to work today. After a three day hiatus filled with violence and bloodshed in Karachi.

I have been having a very strong overpowering feeling of travelling. Of seeing mountains, tall and proud. Of seeing rivers, wide and mighty. Of seeing the wonders of nature. Or seeing distant cities and countries far and wide. Can not explain it. Not like stupid co-workers can not explain why they think a certain thing is wrong. It is different. It is coming from within. Not unlike how one feels in wonderful weather.

So, I have compiled a list. And it turns out that much like stupid co-workers’ way of thinking this is also wrong. Every place on my list is led on by lust. Men. That is it. I dont want to go to Africa or China or the Far East. I want to go to Australia, the Middle East, Central Asia and Europe. So, basically, like all men my age, I am led by my male body part. Damnit! Jalal! Grow up!

I hate being a deprived horny bastard. I am sure you all can see that this post started with Wanderlust and slowly the part of the word was lost.

So, back to wanderlust. I am planning of short trips in nearly places. Historical, Geological, and Natural.

If anyone of you is interested, , , well, , , mail me.

ہم جاگیں گے

It would seem that I do indeed have the capability of creating sub par Urdu verse. I dedicate this to my fellow citizens,

ہم جاگیں گے
ان خوں ریزی کے خابوں سے
ان روزکے نئے عذابوں سے
ان سب ہی خون خرابوں سے
ہم جاگیں گے
اندھیری راتوں میں ابکہ
ماہتاب چمکتا جائے گا
ان پھیکی صبحوں میں ابکہ
خورشید دمکتا جائے گا
ہم جاگیں گے
دھرتی، اگنی، جل، آکاش
ان سب کا یہ کہنا ہے
نظر اٹھائو، سینا تانو
نور برس کر رہنا ہے
ہم جاگیں گے

Karachi Burns

Monday – 26 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 24 Vaisakh 1929 – 14 May 2007

I sit here in my room. Shocked, anguished, angry. And I know that as of this moment I cannot think or articulate my thoughts properly. There has been unspeakable violence in the city over the past three days. A comedy of errors by all the different sides. MQM calling a rally on the day the Chief Justice was to come to Karachi. The Chief Justice for insisting on going the the Sindh High Court by car. The Government for not taking necessary precautions keeping in view Karachi’s past. The opposition for calling a strike today.

More than 35 people have died. We have all seen the harrowing scenes on TV, in newspapers, on the internet and through sms. Scenes that make me feel ashamed of being a part of this whole. Because, no matter how it is seen. I am as much a reason and a part of this mayhem as anyone else. It is my fault that I did not get involved in the social and political life of my city. If I feel I have a voice that preached sanity, I should be preaching it all the time, not just after crisis situations.

Apart from asking each other who was responsible for such mass madness; and then discussing and bickering and not coming to any agreement on how to handle the situation; we need to take steps. As Pakistanis as Karachiites we need to change who we are. We need to condemn and oppose violence and destruction in each and every format. We need to show our politicians that we want actions not rhetoric. The citizens of any modern nation are it’s strongest force. We need to realize this. Our future is in our hands; we can do whatever we want with it.

As for myself. When I go to work tomorrow, I will start as if I was coming to office on Saturday, with not a blemish of this agonizing experience. I will remember it, but I will not let it break my will. Because, in the end that is what this city has, an undying willpower. No matter how much this city has seen it has stood up every time. And it will stand up again, and I will be a part of it.

یوں ہی ہمیشہ الجھتی رہی ہے ظلم سے خلق
نہ ان کی رسم نئی ہے نہ اپنی ریت نئی
یوں ہی ہمیشہ کھلائے ہیں ہم نے آگ میں پھول
نہ ان کی ہار نئی ہے نہ اپنی جیت نئی

چلو پھر سے مسکرائیں ۔ ۔ ۔

Sunday – 25 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 23 Vaisakh 1929 – 13 May 2007

Ok. I know this is not right, or acceptable, or conservative, or respectable. But I so seriously want to get spanked right now.

It is somewhat like that urge you get to have ice cream. Or when you really want to slap someone who is stupid. Or when the idiot in front of you drives like a moron and you want to call them names. You know, innate, natural and overpowering.

I will blame it on the weather and my two day siege within my house. Dont judge me! I know you are rolling your eyes and judgeing me. But dont judge me!

Sunday – 25 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 23 Vaisakh 1929 – 13 May 2007

Mother’s day. Today is the day when I go out and buy three things for Ammi.

First, I get a scarf. Seemingly very easy to find but actually very difficult. It has to be good, or it joins 98.34% of the previous scarves in her drawer and she never uses it. It has to be cheap, or I get a lecture on how money is not to be thrown away. It has to be sedate, otherwise she feels it is too young, and starts feeling older. It has to be traditional, or I get into a long articulate discussion on how modern things lack class and beauty.

Second, I get a Tea Cosy set. A tea cosy, a milk cosy, an apron, overgloves, and a tray cover.  It has to be a new colour, so it can not be Red, Pink, Blue, Green, or Brown, so which colour is left? It has to be embroidered, since I can not do embroidery this is a bitch. It has to have a theme, that I got covered.

Third, I get a Cake. By far the most easiest of all. It is always a plain chocolate cake that I get at our family bakery. No ifs, no buts, it is done.

And, we did the same thing this month. I got a Beige Scarf; a Pink tea cosy set; and a plain chocolate cake.

Mothers can be very very difficult but somehow you love them and they love you. Can not be explained, but one of the bigger mysteries of life.

Saturday – 24 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 22 Vaisakh 1929 – 12 May 2007

For the sake of this city and it’s citizens, I think it would be prudent for people to shift away from the blame game. The firing of even one bullet is a collective failure of the Political Parties, Political Activists, Intelligentsia, Thinkers, and all citizens of this city. Noone is to blame, but we all are.

It is the failure of us as a collective that we are not able to develop a political system clean of violence. It is our fault and our fault only. We will praise every nation we go to. But we will not adapt anything good. What better is there in the world than the place one calls home.

The CJ should return to Islamabad, his staying here will not change the status quo, but his going back might. It is a small chance, but when you are losing lives in an absolute anarchy situation you have to take chances.

In my capacity as a citizen of this city, which might not amount to much in anyone’s eyes, but at the end of the day I as a citizen am all there is to things, I would request the CJ to return to Islamabad. It is a difficult decision since I have supported the CJ since Day 1. But if there is one iota of a chance of improving the situation it is this. And we must take it.

Saturday – 24 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 22 Vaisakh 1929 – 12 May 2007

So much bloodshed. So much destruction. This vile lust for power and seats and glory. And what of the masses huddled in front of their televisions looking with horror at what we have become.

What of us? What of me? What of my friend Imran sitting in his balcony trying to catch of glimpse of his brother coming home? What of my colleage Ahmed whoes uncle was going for the rally? What of my friend Amina who lives in an apartment overlooking the carnage?

This is not Beirut. This is not Calcutta. This is not Bohemia. This is Karachi.

What have we become.

Friday – 23 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 21 Vaisakh 1929 – 11 May 2007

Have just come back from a very long drive through a very large portion of the city. Shahra e Faisal is closed at Tipu Sultan. Security personnel are visible. The city is uncharacteristically calm. The throughfares are solitary. Like the sudden calm during the deep breath before the plunge. But, a plunge into what? Tomorrow is a day when to quite an extent the future of our country will be decided. On the streets. For better or worse. And, for all we know, we don’t know anything. Anything can happen. Anything may happen. It will effect us all. But, we do not know it at all.

It is like a building crashing overhead. It might crash on us, or it might now. The stakes are very high. The absolute lack of clarity or control very complete. Utter and absolute sense of impotence.

Waiting with baited breath as the future of my nation unfolds. Before my very eyes with me as a completely powerless bystander.

Tomorrow will tell.

Wednesday – 21 Rabi us Sani 1428 – 19 Vaisakh 1929 – 09 May 2007

It would seem that Jasmine Revolution will be hitting Karachi on Saturday. It was going to be different, but like all things in this great psychologically imbalanced city of Karachi it is not.

There are massive rallies and peaceful demonstrations planned both by the combined opposition parties who are supporting the visiting Chief Justice in his stand against the government and by the Muttahida Qaumi Movement. Though there is no apparent reason for problems but, be prepared.

As per the training in near anarchical situations that seem to be the norm in all large cities infested by humans. We all wait with baited breath.